Thicker Than Water  by Roy Battocchio

Nobody likes Aunt Gertrude for trying to take over the Corelli family business, and everyone seems to want her out of the way (one way or another). In a most comedic fashion, different members of the Corelli clan make some pretty outlandish plans just how it should be done. What adds to the already confusing confusion is no one knows what the other is planning, or even that their planning anything. It makes for an hilarious romp of people not really knowing what they're doing...and doing it anyway - once again, proving that blood is "Thicker Than Water."

Cast of Characters
(In order of appearance)

A full, round woman in her mid to late-60s, outgoing and warm. She is everything one might expect an old-fashioned Italian mother to be.
A slim, attractive woman of 40. She is perky and animated and though her naivete might make her appear slow, she is in truth, very intelligent. She teaches kindergarten.
Rose's youngest son, a good-looking man about 30. A writer, he lives in California with his wife and two children.
The family doctor. A bulky man in his 80s. He wears black-rimmed glasses to help his poor eyesight, and moves very slowly, giving the impression of always being in a daze.
In his 30s, Carmine is a few years older than his brother, Tommy. He is well-built and burly, and works for his father in the construction business. Not very bright.
Corelli's first born, she is in her late 30s and a real tough cookie. She's a big girl, caring little about her appearance, and it shows. She works for her father as a bookkeeper.
The head of the family and Corelli Construction. He is a robust man in his 60s.
UNCLE ALBERT CORELLI: Dominick's younger brother and co-worker. In his late 50s, a charming, fashionably dapper individual, though he sports a terrible toupee.
Albert's "fancy" wife. She is in her late 40s and a large, "take charge" woman with blinding red hair piled high. A clothes and jewelry horse, she prides herself in her appearance, particularly her hair.
Rose's 98-year-old mother who lives in the basement apartment. She is often heard, but never seen. Her responses are always practically inaudible and appear to be in Italian. Actor should improvise to make them sound as "italian" as possible.

The Setting
Present day. The entire action takes place in the kitchen of the Corelli home on the outskirts of New York City.

Did you know that this play has a sequel?  Battocchio's Dead Wrong continues the Corelli Family antics!

2/12/16: Theatre West Review

Also Available from this Playwright

Thicker Than Water by Roy Battocchio
ISBN #1-60513-172-5; JAC #2012-0028


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